tongue in chic

"However I forgot that the hub was in Dubai and the majority of the OFWs (overseas Filipino workers) were stationed there. The duty-free shop was overrun with Filipino workers selling cell phones and perfume. Meanwhile, I wanted to slash my wrist at the thought of being trapped in a plane with all of them. While I was on the plane (where the seats were so small I had bruises on my legs), my only consolation was the entertainment on the small flat screen in front of me. But it was busted, so I heaved a sigh, popped my sleeping pills and dozed off to the sounds of gum chewing and endless yelling of “HOY! Kumusta ka na? At taga saan ka? Domestic helper ka rin ba?” Translation: “Hey there? Where are you from? Are you a domestic helper as well?” I though I had died and God had sent me to my very own private hell.On my way back, I had to bravely take the economy flight once more. This time I had already resigned myself to being trapped like a sardine in a sardine can with all these OFWs smelling of AXE and Charlie cologne while Jo Malone evaporated into thin air.”

This is the cheeky excerpt from Malu Fernandez’s (could-be) last article in People Asia Magazine, June , 2007 which made her evilly famous – at least to the Pinoy Bloggers.

Well the lady travel writer just wanted to sprinkle some acerbic inputs to the article ala Jessica Zafra’s kind of humor which is usually wrapped in painful annotations on life. But there is supposedly an art in doing this kind of commentary. And Malu Fernandez may just have pushed herself out of the boundaries, particularly when OFW’s are romanticized as the new heroes of the republic. The paragraph’s catty remarks should have been cushioned with some warmth and amiability. But there is nothing in the article that could defend the writer’s caustic personhood. Not even her horrible mistake of taking the flight’s economy class when she considered herself so above them all.

If you get to watch stand up comedies proliferating in the Metro, many of the (usually, gay) hosts would pounce on willing victims – habitués of these bars. The comedians would poke fun on all aspects of information provided by the customers. One time, my singer-cousin, Jerry who had that lilt in the way he talks, was surmised to come from Visayas, and was asked pointblank by the hosts – “Saang barko ka galing” This kind of humor humiliated the un-sophisticates of the Southern region. Yet the audience who I am sure may partly come from the area loved it, and the hosts got away with murder.

But it is in the way these hosts handle such hilarity that provides them ease to get away from a sticky situation. Biglang bawi. Biglang kambyo. They know when it is enough or maybe even more than enough. Either the hosts find something that is worth praising or just give him another chance to dish out another song. And yes terribly, sometimes the singer wannabees just want more minutes on stage to use the damn microphone despite the la-it.

Malu, next time around if you really want to be funny and cutting for your unfortunate victims, you still would want to mitigate your words with some heartful remarks. If not, then just bite that nasty tongue.

a tale of two hens

Well, not exactly. As I meant newshens.

This week ladies in media stole some news space and ended up producing two different repercussions for themselves. Earlier, Gretchen Malalad, the martial arts expert cum Pinoy Big Brother housemate cum ABSCBN police beat reporter found herself in a melee with roguish basketball stalwart Bong Alvarez. Well the professional player after an early morning scuffle with a taxi driver just had to pick another fight this time with Gretchen who was just wanting news details. Well what’s a lady karateka got to do with this scum bag. Now, the lady reporter may have gotten some news reporting chops on her sleeves.

Then came society reporter Malu Fernandez who just had to report on Manila Standard and People Asia Magazine how she disdained OFWs reeking with AXE cologne and Charlie. (I know what AXE can do for men, but does Charlie still exist?) Oh yes, the OFW bloggers won’t take this down and just had to push her bottom out of her cushy seat from these periodicals. Now the lady journalist had to make amends by writing a mea culpa and offering resignation from the publications as of yesterday. Hooray for the OFWs whose sweat may just be as sweet to a stinking financially strapped Philippines.

manila's cacophony of colors

In the almost decaying and decrepit part of Manila’s Sampaloc area where University of Santo Tomas, Asia’s oldest academic bastion is also located, there lies a place that delights the sense of sight and maybe even the smell. Just beside the Dangwa Bus Terminal at Dimasalang St and Dos Castillas St., rows and rows of virtual feast of flowers implore you to take a break and embrace the experience.

The Dangwa Flower Market is Manila’s enchanted garden. This is where variety of floral produce is unloaded from Baguio (as transported by Dangwa Bus). A small stall would have densely packed bundle of vanilla colored baby’s breath. Malaysian mums in strikingly deep hues are tightly fastened and placed lazingly in plastic pails. Fresh Dendrobium Orchids in purple and violet are delicately displayed in plastic wrap. Green foliage litter the red brick floor of the newly fixed up market that evokes the setting of old Manila.

Of course, this flower market has roses of all sizes and shades. Need to seduce a paramour – how about big bulbs of American roses in velvet red, presented as a bouquet draped in Japanese paper. Want to uplift grandma’s spirit – let the shopowner come up with floral arrangement teeming of sunkissed orange and yellow rose blooms. Now how about having that one stem of blue rose (really? could be dyed) for the ultimate crush.

Thankfully, Manila has cheap flowers for the taking. Very likely, prominent flower shops of the Metro would order their merchandise from their suking vendors. It is not a wonder if this sliver of an area is heaving with people not only during February 14 and November 1, dates that require flowers.

But you need to be careful in that area, particularly on a rainy day. Several weeks ago, one boy died as he was swept away by a wave of ankle deep flood. He held on to a Dangwa's lamppost fashioned like the ones in Manila Baywalk. There he got electrocuted and just died.

Thus enjoy viewing and smelling Dangwa's flowers, but don't touch that lamppost. Or else, these flowers may just be brought to you so untimely.

rewriting my brain cloud

yes, life is a constant rewrite. as told early in my psych 101 subject at UP, our thought process adjusts to new stimuli. the brain assimilates and accommodates to new learnings. we start out life as a blank supposedly - a tabula rasa. but such little brain picks up impressions and expressions speedily. and even in its infancy, the brain mightily does its own deletions and erasures. thoughts can be destroyed and be reconstructed.

such is our views with our own living. the hard opinions we now make may just be some reason for feeble whining the next day. the improbability today may just be the most certain thing tomorrow. at times, loads of information may just be needed to stack up until you form a feasible understanding of things going on. and this includes that heated discussion on some disturbing weather patterns.

at first, i was not into this global warming hullaballo. such scientific warning was just another rendition of an apocalypse-now exposition. but this climate thing, this year, weirds me out a lot. supposedly a dry spell should occur this august, and yet here comes the rain again. oh yes, our PAGASA now easily says that the la nina phenomenon is just around some corner. an aftershoot of prayer power perhaps or just truly the effect of that thing called - global warming. (by the way, remember as well that even during the early summer this year, cold spell very much enveloped the luzon area - such that we even had frosted vegetation.)

as my mind's deliberation has probably ended, apparently the academic debate over this process seems not to be over yet. it turns out as i read my two week old newsweek (cover: beijing readies for the olympics), megacorporations dole out megabucks to some quarters in the scientific community to provide excuses for purported global warming. now their main justification seems to be that global warming is a natural happenstance, and not to be blamed on gas emissions.

hmm...well and good....as my views on such occurrence have started with question marks and have ended now with some exclamation points. of course until the next rewrite.

now i wonder if this blogsite has an edit button for such purpose.